The Schoolies Chronicles. (Sat)

I fucking hate the beach; I don’t know why I sometimes think that I like it. I was so happy when I found out that we live like a five minute walk away from the beach, but I was sad when I remembered how much I hate the beach. I hate the sand, I hate the water, I hate the fish, and I hate the crabs... I just hate it all. We ran to the beach with much anticipation for the swim that was awaiting us but as we hit the water I remembered my hatred for it. We started swimming deeper and deeper in and I tried not to let my feet touch the bottom, because every time I took a step I touched something that moved away from underneath my foot. I bailed back to the sand and kicked the footy with Tom before the rest of the boys came out from the water and said that they are going to bury me in the sand... I was not excited.

They went over to the hole that they buried Chris in the day before so that they didn’t have to dig a whole new hole. I didn’t even know that they buried Chris yesterday, I was far too busy getting Kenny intoxicated to make an appearance at the beach, and I’m sure that they forgot to tell me about the burial of Chris because they were too busy watching Brett urinate on him but I guess that it was all explained the next day, so I can’t exactly hold a grudge for the lack of information. We started digging more into the hole, because they said that Chris wasn’t deep enough and they wanted me to be deeper into the sand. After we finished the digging I sat in cross legged, and fuck... I wish I was in a more comfortable position, because the second they started piling the sand on I knew that I was going to be in pain by the time that I got out... if I got out.

At one stage I actually thought that I was going to die, there was sand gushing into my mouth and my breathing was all fucked. Whenever I went to take a breath I could feel my stomach pressing up against sand and getting virtually no air. Then Andrew told me that if I just stopped panicking then I would be able to breathe properly. I stopped panicking but when they waved over a bunch of random girls I was quite frightened that they would step up to me and get sand in my eyes or something. I don’t know why it was, but that was my biggest fear at the time. They got there and started laughing at me and then one of them took a picture of me that I am, devastatingly enough, yet to be tagged in. Brett helped me a little bit but I ended up getting out pretty much by myself. I knew that when I tore my first arm out of the sand that I was getting somewhere and then I dug out my right arm and from there I struggled myself out of the sand, ran straight into the water and got as much of the sand off as I could.

We made it home where I showered with Brett or Jack or someone, I mean it’s not like anyone was allowed to shower by themself for the whole trip because Brett was so against wasting the Murray... either that or he was really for gay showers, either way I was with someone. We heated up the pies that I responsibly defrosted the night before in the microwave and or oven and ate them for lunch and then we responsibly started drinking... responsibly... This was an immediate regret, I mean my mind set was that I would get drunk during the day and I would maintain that drunken level by keeping up the drinking and then go to schoolies and be fucked. I wouldn’t have to wait in the line or anything to get wrist bands or anything, so I should hopefully still be fucked by the time I get to wherever it is that I will be dancing. This plan was completely thrown out the window when I started sobering up at like six at night. This was quite the opposite to Tom who had passed out on the chair he was sitting on. He was kind of like Christine was the night before, but I nursed her back to health and ready to party much like Nurse Joy would help a Pokémon ready for battle, but Tom was a bad case.

We carried Tom into the shed where we let him rest for the night. I was so sad because Tom and I were going to be each other’s wingmen in the competition and try to rack up as many as we could. I then started to see this from a competitive point of view, I could use this as a head start, I could try and get with as many girls as possible and blitz Tom in the scoreboard and hopefully he couldn’t catch up. Either way I thought about it, it didn’t work because by the end of the night I was still on nothing. At the bus stop Dajana was hooking up with some random guy for quite a while, but the while that was quite was broken up when Jack came up to Andrew and I and said 'have my back on this one,' as he walked up to Dajana, pulled the guy off her and started yelling 'what the fuck are you doing? That's my girlfriend!' Now just in case you don't know, Dajana is not Jack's boyfriend, it was all a joke but it was the funniest thing since... well, since Kenny drank piss. Jack pulled her away and walked away and then Andrew and I stepped in on the guy and got up in his face yelling, 'that's my fucking best mate! How do you go about getting with his girlfriend?' The guy somehow figured out that it was a joke, I think it was when Jack started laughing, and this made it a whole lot less funny so Andrew and I stopped harassing the guy. Still, the initial look on the guys face when Jack pulled her off and started yelling... priceless.

Chris had gotten with some girl on the bus to schoolies and then Andrew got with a supposedly hot girl. Andrew was happy that he had gotten with the same amount of people as Chris for the one night but was devastated once Chris got his second hook up for the night almost seconds after Andrew, bringing his total to three.

Hook ups or no hook ups, Saturday was an amazing night... well it was probably the worst for me but seeing as though all the nights were amazing it’s not like the worst night was anything close to bad. I ended up meeting up with Tyler Johns, someone who before that night was just an internet person. I also met up with Sarah Jachmann who I have never met before, as in not even on the internet. She said that she reads my blogs and it just made me happy how this complete random... nah I was so happy. Probably the worst part about Saturday night was getting home. I have a terrible sense of direction, even around Adelaide, net alone Goolwa. I walked to the bus stop or whatever the place where the bus comes to pick people up from schoolies and take them back home... yeah, the bus stop... anyway I walked there and waited for the Goolwa bus for like, twenty minutes. Oh yeah, and it was pissing down with rain as well. By the time I got on the bus I was actually soaked with water, like it looked like I just jumped in a pool, swam for around about eighteen hours and then got out. I got off the bus at beach road and the rain was even worse, I started running in the direction that I thought home was from the second I got off the bus and somehow I got there without making any wrong turns... I was amazed in my sense of direction for the first time in my life, and then I went to bed.

Andrew Heinicke 1

Chris Tankosic 3
Nick Cosma 0
Tom Wilkin 0